the birthday post
on the birthday blues and turning 24
last thursday was my birthday! i wasn’t as excited for it this year as i usually am.
i recently read an article on slate written by lauren vinopal that unpacks the “birthday blues” and how the stress revolving around your annual big day can feel like an inevitable crushing emotional weight.
as a frequent host and entertainer, i love planning extravagant themed parties (last year was a fairy/forest/woodland creature theme) and felt as if anything that i planned for this year would’ve been inadequate to my usual party standards. plus, i was unsure about hosting my first party in an undecorated, recently moved-into apartment.
leading up to my birthday, i had a physically-draining move from boston to new york, continued to settle into my new home and neighborhood, and lost my cat to a terminal illness in the span of three weeks. emotionally, i’ve been all over the place and thought that i couldn’t peacefully enjoy my birthday given the circumstances.
i’m happy to share that my last-minute party was everything that i could’ve dreamed of, especially considering the little thought that went into planning it and the $20 holographic decorations from dollar tree. shoutout to partiful for being the most convenient way to plan a party — i actually might have given up on planning it if their site didn’t have the cutest graphics and functional features.
following my party, i spent quality time with my boyfriend and friend while they both visited new york, and i quickly learned that i need to begin growing my recommendation lists for my guests. (it’s a growing process!) since we were on a go-with-the-flow type of time, my friend’s visit primarily revolved around kelela’s show on march 17, which felt like a conveniently-timed birthday visit. i also got two tattoos and two piercings, ate so many good meals, and took some well-deserved naps.
my newest additions to my patchwork sleeve: a suitcase inspired by my love of travel but also two of my favorite albums (tyler, the creator’s call me if you get lost and sir’s chasing summer) and a postage stamp with citrus that reminds me of home
this year, i could’ve written something more sentimental like my previous 21 things i learned at 21 post. but in reality, i’ve had a difficult time writing for pleasure lately, and my substack hasn’t seen that much of me besides my monthly icymi post. there’s no deadlines or pressure to write anything timely for my newsletter, so i’m hoping to deliver some fun things to your emails in the next two months. until then, thank you for reading and goodbye pisces season!
thanks for reading screaming into the void, but in lowercase! if you didn’t tell me happy birthday, subscribe to support my work. it’s the least you could do!